2020: Fa la la la f*ck

 by Jenna Pastuszek

This morning in the Reach Out Party, we were asked to share a question that feels interesting to ask others….ya know, something more interesting to be asked than “How are you?” (Alive. Sane. Zoomed. How are you?) I shared that I’ve been asking people, “What’s your version of “holiday cookies” aka what’s something that you always look forward to at this time of year?”  Carly Valancy, host of the Party, generously pointed out that it was a fantastic question to ask because it also told the question recipient something about me. Now, the person on the receiving end knows my love (obsession) of anything that claims to be a cookie (re: claims- ask my college roommates about the “healthy” things that, honestly, tasted like dirt, but I ate them anyway because it claimed it was a cookie on the box). And, that person now also knows that I acknowledge and accept people who don’t have the same obsession (love) of cookies as I may have at this time of year (I acknowledge and accept you, I don’t understand you, but I accept you).

One thing that I’ve learned in 2020 is that it is a GIFT to share the joy and excitement that you feel about something with others. We’ve all seen it. We see it when someone’s eyes LIGHT UP as soon as you ask them about whatever the thing is. There’s a sparkle, a glow, and an energetic expansion that transforms the person. It’s time stopping, radiant, and a truly magical moment. It is exciting to see and witness someone transform right in front of your eyes.

What is noticeable to me is that as soon as many people notice that they’ve lost themselves in sharing their joy, they immediately “snap out of it” and come back down to the conversation with an apology. What they forget is that by watching someone else connect so viscerally to their joy, we remember our own.

I think back to pre-COVID theatre life and the pay-to-plays I took with casting directors. Often times, they’d ask me why I chose the song I chose to sing. I tried so hard to give the “right” answer, to prove to them that I was smart and had good musical taste and knew my “type” within the industry and could justify it all with my answer. How much better would it have been if I had declared boldly, “Because I f*cking love this song!”

In 2021, I am going to continue to speak with conviction about the things I’m passionate and excited about. I don’t care if you think it’s stupid because it’s not about you agreeing with me about the awesomeness of the magical thing, it’s about you getting to remember whatever is magical to you.

I am going to dare to be vulnerable and let others see and experience my joy, my passion, my radiant magic. There is nothing more thrilling than watching a great singer enjoy singing. Say goodbye to the days of being scared or apologetic about sharing the sparkle.

I am not going to risk robbing someone of an opportunity to see their own joy by expressing mine. I am going to give voice and power to the things that light me up and talk about them as much as I can because maybe, by sharing mine, someone else will be inspired to share theirs.

And I am going to eat many, many cookies.

So…What’s your version of “holiday cookies” aka what’s something that you always look forward to at this time of year?

Tell me! I want to see those eyes light up!